I believe that clubbing baby seals is a honorable endeavour. Now, you may think I'm friggen crazy, and you're probably right.

First off, humans eat fish. Alot of humans like fish. If the seal population goes unchecked, then they will eat all our fish. Lemme tell you, they eat alot of fish. A lot.

Also, baby seals are notorious man-eaters. I've seen them tear a full grown man to pieces. It's a terrible sight.

Furthermore, baby seals are easy to kill. They can't run very fast. I'm really lazy and I don't want to have to work alot just to smash a baby seal's head open. It would also be a good workout. I'm sure that those sticks you use to crack 'em open are pretty heavy. It could build muscle.

You would also want to kill baby seals when they're young. It would be more humane this way, because they haven't yet gotten used to life enough to miss it when they are dead. Kill 'em when they're young, before they start to enjoy life.

Finally, the most important reason baby seals should be clubbed.



It's friggen hilarious.